Boulevard of Broken Dreams
by fuzzy bunnies
Summary: Song-fic for the 9th doctor. Pre "Rose" and after the Time War. After the Time War the Doctor walks alone.


Disclaimer: If I owned Doctor Who I would have seen the trailer for the 50th anniversary already.

Boulevard Of Broken Dreams

"I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known

Don't know where it goes

But it's home to me and I walk alone"

The Time war had broken him. Completely. Utterly. A glance could tell you that. He didn't travel anymore, he wandered. The road became his home. That boulevard that was paved with good intentions, with hopes and dreams and wonder, he walked it alone now.

"I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

When the city sleeps

And I'm the only one and I walk alone"

Sometimes, between revolutions and civil wars and blood baths and heartaches, he would stop to catch his breath. He would park his beloved TARDIS on a street corner of a small town and order chips. He watched them sleep, the humans, content in their own little planet with their beans on toast and carpets and curtains. Always he longed, if only for a moment, for a life like that, a life without running. He would shake his head and wander down the deserted streets. He walked alone.

"I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a..."

He repeated it to himself like a mantra: "I walk alone, I walk alone, I walk alone..." It was the only thing left to hold on to. He was never going to put another stupid ape in harms way. Never again.

"My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me

'til then I walk alone"

He has to remind himself that there aren't any pathetic humans chasing after him anymore. It was just his cursed double heartbeat that occupied the TARDIS now. Just him, no one but this daft, old face of his. And, Rassilon be damned, he missed having a human around! He wished someone would find him, travel with him, but until then: "I walk alone, I walk alone..."

"I'm walking down the line

That divides me somewhere in my mind

On the border line

Of the edge and where I walk alone"

The Doctor walked a thin line between madness and sanity. Alway on the edge, teetering over nothingness. The slightest push and he would fall. It scared him. It scared him to the point that he strengthened his walls. He put on his unfeeling mask that no one seemed quite able to see through. He hid underneath his hard stare and leather jacket. He focused on moving forward.

"Read between the lines

What's f-ed up and everything's alright

Check my vital signs

To know I'm still alive and I walk alone"

It wasn't hard for the people he saved to read between the lines. This dangerous and powerful man was shattered on the inside. "Everything's alright!" he would insist. Although no one argued, they knew. "Check my vitals" he would say as he limped towards his ship "everything's alright."

"I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk alone

I walk a..."

He repeated it after every 'adventure' as the faces of the dead multiplied in his head. Sobbing he would repeat the words that held him together: "I walk alone, I walk alone, I walk alone..." Over and over and over until it didn't hurt so much.

"My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me

'til then I walk alone"

He knew that it was stupid but he wished on every star in the galaxy that he wouldn't have to be alone. He wished his shadow wasn't the only one brave enough to follow him. He wished that his double heart beats weren't the only sound on the TARDIS at night. Most of all he wished he had a hand to hold.

"I walk this empty street

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

When the city sleeps

And I'm the only one and I walk a..."

It was on one of those short breaks that he landed wrong. Instead of quiet, sleepy, Leadworth he ended up in London. As he realized this the TARDIS pushed him out. He shook his head and repeated his mantra.

"My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me

'til then I walk alone..."

Again he felt himself long for a companion as he waded through the crowd on their way to work. Instead of his usual mantra though he thought "someone please find me." And she did.

"Run!"

Author's Note: This is, believe it or not, my first story. Reviews are much appreciated.


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